Being a caregiver is not an easy task. Whether you are a new mom caring
for your babies, your toddlers or even harder - your teenagers; or you
are a woman carrying the burden of raising a family, caring for a sick
loved one or aging parent and working a full time job - the struggles
are still the same. Exhaustion, frazzled moments, anger, resentment and
utter frustration are warning signs that you need to step back, take a
breath and just remember that you are not alone.
God did not put you in this moment, at this time, in this season to fail. He has a plan and sometimes the success of that plan is hinged on you realizing that you must be at the end of your rope, feeling weak and abandoned, so that He can remind you of how strong He is and how capable you are when you rely on Him.
Not easy. I know. I am preaching to the choir, but this is the life I live.
And today I am at the end of my rope. Missing my dad something fierce, frustrated at the circumstances of my life and yet believing that the God of the Universe really does have my best interest at heart.
And EVERYONE tells me I need to write a book about my daily adventures, but the reality is that by the time I get to this space and time, I am beyond capable of forming a coherent sentence to tell the funny, amusing and often unbelievable stories that make up my so called crazy life. But I have a few to tell today, so here goes...
Yesterday I took my daughter to a ceramic place to paint our own ceramic pieces. We arrived about 20 minutes before they opened because the website listed the hours wrong, so we decided to take advantage of the extra time to look around the town square. It was a beautiful fall morning and we had the best time taking in all the sites around the area and killing time. We arrived back at the store just as they were opening and when we went to get a few things out of our car, a moment of panic hit as we realized the car was missing. In shock, I actually asked her - like she would know - where is our car? To which she matter of factly answered..."There it goes!" And we watched as a tow truck drove away with our vehicle.
I will admit to you now that I began to freak out.
BTS (before the stroke) I would have called my husband, but now, I must handle these things on my own. So I calmly told my daughter, "it's ok, we were parked properly in the right lot, and this will get resolved no problem". And I meant it, although the adrenaline was so fierce in my veins that I could not even begin to think about picking up a piece of fragile pottery for at least 10 - 15 minutes.
Now, I spoke to the shop manager and she had it resolved in no time, got us settled and we began our girls day out with a fresh resolve to let nothing stand in our way. And as we began to paint, my daughter set the whole thing in a new perspective for me and she said, "well this is definitely a day we will never forget!" And she was right. We had a blast and we have laughed about it ever since.
Today, the kids and I went skating and ran errands and picked up something for dinner - which was most definitely an adventure...but that is for another day except to say...when Pizza Hut says any crust is $10 - they do NOT mean ANY CRUST! I ordered a $10 pizza that ended up costing me $14, which is a 40% increase because I ordered a Stuffed Crust pizza. The name even has Crust in the title, and it is not considered part of the "ANY CRUST" they are advertising. Yes, I am just a bit peeved with them about this. It doesn't help that I am in marketing, and I strongly believe you should have truth in your advertising. Integrity and Words really do mean something. So say what you mean and mean what you say whether that is in friendship, your job and most importantly in communications with your customers.
After that fiasco and cleaning up dinner, sending the kids to shower, I headed to the pharmacy to pick up prescriptions. And while I was in complete meltdown mode of missing my dad, and the rough ending to my otherwise wonderful day, I stood in the pharmacy with tears streaming down my face and make up streaked across my cheeks and do you know that not a single person during the 20 minutes I was in there ever asked if I was ok? Not that I wanted them to, but I have to admit...these people have seen me at least 4 or 5 times a month for the last 18 months and I recognize them. I know you should not bite the hand that medicates you, but how sad is it that when someone in on the brink of a major meltdown that no one asks or says anything.
How many people who have no hope feel the way I did today? How many times have I walked by someone I thought may be hurting and did not stop to talk to them. My heart was so heavy for how we treat each other in this world. God is looking for those who will be caregivers enough to step into someone else's mess and help them clean it up. A hand up not a hand out.
I am a bit different in that I have hope and I have enough courage to ask for help when I need it and tonight I asked two very dear friends if I could come by just to get a hug. A safe place, with warm smiles and caring eyes and ears to help me get through the tough times like tonight.
What about those who don't have that courage or those kind of people in their lives? I want to be that person that helps those around me. I may already be stretched thin in my caregiving duties, but God help me to never let someone (like I was tonight) go unnoticed and un-cared for around me. Let me see with your eyes, those who need a caregiver of LIFE to point them straight to you.
And may we all realize that as we live and breathe, we were placed on this earth to care for those we come in contact with. To show them the love of Jesus and to be His hands and feet to those in need. Thank you to those in my life who give that to me when I need it most, and hopefully I succeed more than I fail in my care-giving to this world.
God did not put you in this moment, at this time, in this season to fail. He has a plan and sometimes the success of that plan is hinged on you realizing that you must be at the end of your rope, feeling weak and abandoned, so that He can remind you of how strong He is and how capable you are when you rely on Him.
Not easy. I know. I am preaching to the choir, but this is the life I live.
And today I am at the end of my rope. Missing my dad something fierce, frustrated at the circumstances of my life and yet believing that the God of the Universe really does have my best interest at heart.
And EVERYONE tells me I need to write a book about my daily adventures, but the reality is that by the time I get to this space and time, I am beyond capable of forming a coherent sentence to tell the funny, amusing and often unbelievable stories that make up my so called crazy life. But I have a few to tell today, so here goes...
 |
| Our ceramic handiwork ready for the Kiln |
I will admit to you now that I began to freak out.
BTS (before the stroke) I would have called my husband, but now, I must handle these things on my own. So I calmly told my daughter, "it's ok, we were parked properly in the right lot, and this will get resolved no problem". And I meant it, although the adrenaline was so fierce in my veins that I could not even begin to think about picking up a piece of fragile pottery for at least 10 - 15 minutes.
Now, I spoke to the shop manager and she had it resolved in no time, got us settled and we began our girls day out with a fresh resolve to let nothing stand in our way. And as we began to paint, my daughter set the whole thing in a new perspective for me and she said, "well this is definitely a day we will never forget!" And she was right. We had a blast and we have laughed about it ever since.
Today, the kids and I went skating and ran errands and picked up something for dinner - which was most definitely an adventure...but that is for another day except to say...when Pizza Hut says any crust is $10 - they do NOT mean ANY CRUST! I ordered a $10 pizza that ended up costing me $14, which is a 40% increase because I ordered a Stuffed Crust pizza. The name even has Crust in the title, and it is not considered part of the "ANY CRUST" they are advertising. Yes, I am just a bit peeved with them about this. It doesn't help that I am in marketing, and I strongly believe you should have truth in your advertising. Integrity and Words really do mean something. So say what you mean and mean what you say whether that is in friendship, your job and most importantly in communications with your customers.
After that fiasco and cleaning up dinner, sending the kids to shower, I headed to the pharmacy to pick up prescriptions. And while I was in complete meltdown mode of missing my dad, and the rough ending to my otherwise wonderful day, I stood in the pharmacy with tears streaming down my face and make up streaked across my cheeks and do you know that not a single person during the 20 minutes I was in there ever asked if I was ok? Not that I wanted them to, but I have to admit...these people have seen me at least 4 or 5 times a month for the last 18 months and I recognize them. I know you should not bite the hand that medicates you, but how sad is it that when someone in on the brink of a major meltdown that no one asks or says anything.
How many people who have no hope feel the way I did today? How many times have I walked by someone I thought may be hurting and did not stop to talk to them. My heart was so heavy for how we treat each other in this world. God is looking for those who will be caregivers enough to step into someone else's mess and help them clean it up. A hand up not a hand out.
I am a bit different in that I have hope and I have enough courage to ask for help when I need it and tonight I asked two very dear friends if I could come by just to get a hug. A safe place, with warm smiles and caring eyes and ears to help me get through the tough times like tonight.
What about those who don't have that courage or those kind of people in their lives? I want to be that person that helps those around me. I may already be stretched thin in my caregiving duties, but God help me to never let someone (like I was tonight) go unnoticed and un-cared for around me. Let me see with your eyes, those who need a caregiver of LIFE to point them straight to you.
And may we all realize that as we live and breathe, we were placed on this earth to care for those we come in contact with. To show them the love of Jesus and to be His hands and feet to those in need. Thank you to those in my life who give that to me when I need it most, and hopefully I succeed more than I fail in my care-giving to this world.
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